NOVEL CONVERSATIONS – Episode 5
Bry and I planned on seeing the new Little Women movie, that came out a few weeks back. To prepare ourselves, we watched the 1994 version of Little Women the weekend before. And then today, after finally seeing the 2019 version, I turned to a podcast, discussing this beloved book.
More on that later.
SO WHAT SATURDAY!
Motherhood. I have a few ideas – a few things to try on my little humans this week, after putting some thought into my posts over the past 4 or 5 days:
- I want to be more careful to give non-emotional responses to the children’s behavior. I want to cut out the drama on my end. No drama. That is a choice I can make, not a circumstance can hope for.
- I want to encourage the children listen to and for the truth, in things presented to them as well as in their own thoughts – “The only things that are true are things that feel loving, focused, kind, compassionate, and honest.” I want to discuss that philosophy with the children, and see what truth we can find in it.
- I want to magnify my primary roles over other roles. I loved loved loved how Nicholeen prepared for her meetings at the UN building by playing board games with her children – she prepared for her other roles by magnifying her primary role. “If I do not live those primary roles as they were intended to be lived, and maximize them and magnify them, I will never feel fulfilled. Period. If you don’t live your self-evident role, all other roles will crumble.”
- I want to be more careful to not interfere, but let the children figure things out. I want to encourage creative problem solving, and support them when they have an idea on their own.
- I want to ask my children their point of view before accusing them or forcing my point on view on them. I can see why my 11-year old would feel strongly about that point! I am afraid he gets more than his fair share of criticism, and not just from me. Boys at this age do – from teachers, from other adults, etc. “(Kids) really don’t appreciate criticism when we are trying our best. It is better to be praised for the one thing you did right rather than be criticized for the 1000 things you did wrong.”
There are a million and one ways I could improve as a mother. I am okay with that. I feel like these are a few ways I can make big improvements.
But. Sometimes, when I am not in a good place, I feel so incredibly overwhelmed.
“The same thing that bothered me about (Little Women) as an adult, bothered me as a child. And that’s why I read the story over and over again. I was always trying to figure out why I am not as good as these girls, and why my mom wasn’t perfect like their mom, Marmee”
Well. Marmee is fictional. I cannot be Marmee. I am okay with that. And I am okay with my children. But there are some true principles taught in the book that I think we can learn from, even if the characters are fiction.
I want to close with some of my favorite quotes from Little Women, by Louisa May Alcott:
“Your father, Jo. He never loses patience, never doubts or complains, but always hopes, and works and waits so cheerfully that one is ashamed to do otherwise before him.”
“Love is a great beautifier.”
“Have regular hours for work and play; make each day both useful and pleasant, and prove that you understand the worth of time by employing it well. Then youth will bring few regrets, and life will become a beautiful success.”
“Watch and pray, dear, never get tired of trying, and never think it is impossible to conquer your fault.”
“Speaking of Father reminded me how much I miss him, how much I owe him, and how faithfully I should watch and work to keep his little daughters safe and good for him.”
“For with eyes made clear by many tears, and a heart softened by the tenderest sorrow, she recognized the beauty of her sister’s life—uneventful, unambitious, yet full of the genuine virtues which ‘smell sweet, and blossom in the dust’, the self-forgetfulness that makes the humblest on earth remembered soonest in heaven, the true success which is possible to all.”