I want to start today’s post with two stories that Jody shared in this episode:

“A woman I coached recently said that she was very fortunate to have found two amazing men to marry. Her first husband passed away shortly after they were married, and he was an amazing wonderful man. Her second husband, to whom she is still married, is also a wonderful man. I told her that she is the common denominator! If she were to be married a third time, she would believe that he was also an amazing wonderful man. They are amazing and wonderful because she believes they are.

A woman in the grocery store yesterday was on her phone telling someone a dramatic story about a person in her life who is not being fair or reasonable. Minutes later I heard her complaining to the store clerk about how her groceries are not right, and how she should be able to expect better service. And she demanded to speak to a manager. My guess is that she believes people mistreat her and that her life is unfair a lot. She doesn’t realize that she is the common denominator.

Each one of us is the constant in our own lives – the one thing we can continuously expect. We are the common denominator. This is exactly why we only need to work on ourselves to create the life that we want. What a relief.”

I want to look at my life. And I don’t know that it’s quite as clear as in these two examples, but I want to ask myself, in what way I am the common denominator in different areas of my life.

  • My children are brilliant. Every one of them. And if I were to have a sixth child, I am sure, without a doubt, that they would be every bit as brilliant as my five are now. I am the common denominator.
  • Every home I have lived in has felt like home. I have loved every one of our homes, with all my heart. They have exactly met my needs, and served me and my family perfectly. I am the common denominator.
  • Bed-time every night tends to be difficult for me. One child needs a drink. One child wants to talk. One child in hungry. One child doesn’t want to pray. Some are “too old” to go to bed. One is far too young to still be awake. It is rare that evening prayer is a spirit-filled experience, or that tears aren’t shed in abundance in those short 20 minutes we take to get everyone to bed. Is it possible, again, that I am the common denominator? That I could change our bed-time experience by reconsidering my own needs in the evenings, and how I can meet those needs myself? That I could look more closely at the thoughts I am entertaining, particularly the thoughts that might be judgmental?

“Judgement never serves us. It’s small minded and fear based. It is based on false beliefs. It is toxic for our Spirits.

We waste our mental energy and time trying to change other people and situations. That is such a waste of energy and time! That is energy that could be much better used changing ourselves and getting the result that we want in the end.”

LIE: Bryant and the children control how smoothly my evenings go.

LIE: My way of doing bed-time is the only way, or even the best way of doing bed-time.

TRUTH: The children are exactly who they are supposed to be – every single hour of the day, every single day of the week.

TRUTH: I am the constant in my own life – the one thing I can continuously expect. I am the common denominator. I only need to work on myself to create the life – or the bed-time routine – that I want.


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